The compound is decorated with care,
The meal preparations are underway,
And we’re receiving a steady delivery of presents from friends and family members. If you have a zombie child to shop for this year, here’s our Top Five list of presents for zombie kids.
1. Remote control fire truck or police car. Zombie kids respond to light and sound, trucks and cars with sirens and flashing lights will keep them occupied for hours while our staff use the remote control to keep the vehicles moving.
2. Socker Boppers. Yes, we know that encouraging zombie kids in activities such as hand to hand combat or shooting is a dangerous activity. These socker boppers, though, are perfect for activities like catch the bunny, in which we set a live bunny loose and the kids chase it. The socker boppers guarantee that even if they get close to the rabbit, they can’t pick it up. The children burn off energy and compete with one another to be the first to touch the bunny.
3. Animal Popper. The look of joy and surprise on a zombie child’s face when he or she squeezes the toy and a ball pops high into the air is priceless. Our children can spend several hours launching the balls and retrieving them.
4. Rocking horses. Plush rocking horses provide an excellent diversion for zombie children who wish to leave the confines of the compound. They are lulled by the action of the rocking horse and plush horses are easily fixed if the child becomes overexuberant or starts to bite.
5. Hide and Seek Tunnel. Every parent has a memory of playing peek a boo with their child and the broad grins and delicate giggles that accompanied the game. Our zombie kids get the same joy out of hide and seek tunnels, burrowing inside to hide, and then popping out to surprise staff members and other kids.
We hope to see you at our Christmas Eve party and remember, we feed the zombie children so you don’t have to. Best wishes from everyone at the Zombie Emergency Relief Organization.